Celebrating Sobriety: How Humbercare supported XX to make positive changes within her life which were fundamental to achieving independence.

Hi, my name is XX, I have been supported by Humbercare on the Framework Project for over 7 and half years now. I have struggled with Alcoholism for a long time, since in my twenties, it’s only now at the age of fifty-six that I feel I have more control over my addiction and wish to share my journey with you.

History with Abuse, Loss and Alcoholism

I was married in my twenties and had two sons which I adored but sadly, my relationship was not a pleasant one, fuelled with violence. I was a victim of domestic violence and I struggled cope with it. My ex-husband worked, but once home he drank alcohol to excess which led to our marriage breaking down. My mental health, anxieties and obsessive-compulsive disorders were hugely affected and became much more apparent. I loved being a mum and the boys kept me going, but sadly, so did alcohol. I eventually met a new partner, who also had problems with alcohol. Again, it was history repeating itself, but now I was pregnant and expecting twins. Sadly, lost my baby girls at full-term which was immensely tough and a heart breaking time in my life as well as for all of the family. I couldn’t cope with the loss and being a victim of domestic violence, I hit rock bottom. Our relationship came to an end and my two sons by then had been placed with my parents permanently, leading to a distance between myself and my family. I moved out of the area but didn’t settle well, this led to my alcohol addiction reaching all-time high. In 2014 I lived in Barton, the shared house where I resided was deemed as unsafe and was condemned, so I was re-housed nearer to Grimsby, it was then that I was referred to Humbercare support. I have had so much help, supported by other agencies plus many attempts to detox and be alcohol free, at times I would detox for a year but struggle so I would eventually resort back to binge drinking, which often led to having alcohol induced fits. I tried to settle, I loved my flat and made it homely. During this time, I housed a cat, who to this day is my best friend!

Improving Relationships

My life has spiralled at times, challenged by life situations where I cannot cope, my only way was to be fuelled by alcohol to block out my worries, anxieties and stresses. Despite my alcoholism being evident, I binged and to some extent coped better on the surface, but was crumbling inside. However, at this time and with Humbercare’s help I did re-gain confidence. I began a voluntary job and started to see my family so much more. In 2019 I had support to find a ground floor flat through social housing. I felt settled and although my health conditions weren’t as they once were, I was reassured I would cope better with my living conditions being suitable for my mobility, improving my future.

Working through Challenges and Set-backs

In late 2020 I met someone, I was happy, but the world was taken over by Covid-19 and I welcomed the company, especially with the recent death of my father. This was short-lived though as I was again a victim of domestic violence. The Police, Humbercare and other agencies became strong contacts for me, my drinking continued to the point where I was so intoxicated that I fell in my flat and broke my hip. To this day, I feel that was the pinnacle moment when I realised if I continued drinking to excess, there be no return for me. My family were amazing and with support I returned home from hospital and started to heal from a hip replacement operation. My mobility has suffered massively, but emotionally and mentally I feel I have become stronger. In a strange way, my broken hip has saved me. I was referred to weekly counselling and it has become my safe place and somewhere I can go and not feel judged by others. I even volunteer at an arts and crafts group which I really enjoy. My relationship has grown with my family, and I have received so much support which is specifically aimed at helping me with my addiction. I have been on detox for 2 years, 2 months…and counting, and although sobriety has its ups and downs with the general challenges of life, I feel it’s time to celebrate this with you. My support network has been so, so important. We must continue to talk, seeking help and support, as it is out there if we want it!

Looking towards a Positive Future

Humbercare have continued to support me through my ‘rock bottom’ moments, liaising with agencies that have been, and are still, crucial in my recovery, ensuring me that I am being heard.  They have monitored my general and mental health, and supported me during my most vulnerable times, Humbercare even provided support to my family members when they needed emotional support too. From the bottom of my heart – Thank you Humbercare and thank you to my support worker, including your amazing colleagues who have helped me along the way.

Conclusion

Through her openness and honesty, XX shares with us how Humbercare has helped her to establish a positive foundation within her life, encouraging her to achieve her goals. Through Humbercare's support and guidance, it was possible for XX to reflect on her life, make necessary changes, reach out for help and achieve her mission of sobriety which has ultimately massively improved her relationships, health and happiness.